“My fear of failure.”
“Have I volunteered for more than what I can handle? What if both end up not done well?”
A bowl of soupy noodles. Crispy “swallow dumplings”. An honest expression… Realisation? Crystals in her eyes, shimmering. Bravely blinking them back. I saw myself, a much younger me, in the reflection of her watery gaze.
“Your awareness is a first step”. You have choices: to push/stop yourself. You can choose. Choose well.
Will she have to learn the hard way? Maybe not. She seems to like her sleep and leisure well enough. I hope. Enough to not be overwhelmed by a sense of achievement and youthful aspiration.
So this is why yesterday’s lesson in Romans 4 stood out. I was feeling quite sick, half-wondering if it was a mistake to go for class. But. Lesson on FAITH. Today I understand the lesson. After watching a young one tear over lunch. Faith – not in my abilities, situation, plain optimism, other people, past track record, words of encouragement/comfort. But IN CHRIST. That faith will help me to choose well. Walk well. Live well.