Blank Canvas

“LORD, help me to glorify You.
I am poor, help me to glorify You by contentment;
I am sick, help me to give You honor by patience;
I have talents, help me to extol You by spending them for You;
I have time, Lord, help me to redeem it that I may serve You;
I have a heart to feel, Lord, let that heart feel no love but Yours and glow with no flame but affection for You;
I have a head to think, Lord, help me to think of You and for You;
You have put me in this world for something, Lord, show me what that is and help me to work out my life purpose.
I cannot do much, but I am all Yours;
take me and enable me to glorify You now,
in all that I say, in all that I do, and with all that I have.”
– Spurgeon

*

Today I sat down with blank paper and started writing & drawing. Nothing unusual – this has been very much part of my regular activity since NPL began. But this was no ordinary piece of blank paper.

It was a ‘decision picture’ paper.

As I wrote and drew, I increasingly felt the weight of the decisions I have to make. Realised with amusement: the more important and complex a decision, the neater and smaller my handwriting becomes. Slower too. A snail could have written faster than me.

Realised with some bittersweetness also, that there have been many ‘blank canvases’ before. 1992, 1996, 1999, 2001, 2002, 2004, 2005, 2007, 2008, 2010, 2011.

I haven’t always enjoyed those blank canvases. Sometimes they were thrust upon me; sometimes I found them because I was too curious for my own good. Only once have I chosen to take the blank canvas of my own accord – and it was the biggest ever. I don’t know if I’ll ever have to do (or choose to do) that again. Only God knows.

But there is a certain energy in a blank canvas. It’s so full of… possibilities. Newness. Hope. Life. Cleanness. Another chance. I remember how that feels.

I hold fast to that hopefulness and expectancy this time too.

And look to the Painter for His instruction on the masterpiece.

 

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About lilac butterfly

Live. Love. Learn. Laugh. Write. Draw. Colour. Blend. Play. Dream. Cry. Reflect. Pray. Sing. Worship. Bake. Cook. Rest. Give thanks.

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